My Dear Children,
I thought it was important to tell you how one song changed my life.
I was in high school from August 1990 to May of 1994. My Freshman year was hard because there are some terrible social pressures on you when you’re 13 years old. I was certainly not cool by any stretch of the word, and usually spent my free time hiding in the library avoiding people. Maybe you have noticed I still do that from time to time when I’m uncomfortable – thank God I have your mom to help me when I fail socially.
When I started my Sophomore year of high school, it looked like I would have a similar, lonely year. A few weeks after school started, when I was 14 years old, something changed me: “Smells Like Teen Spirit” by Nirvana.
You see, I’ve always loved music but it was misdirected. The first album I got was Can’t Slow Down by Lionel Richie. In high school, I was listening to stuff like Poison, Guns n Roses, INXS, or White Lion. I liked music with guitars, stuff that was listenable and “edgy.”
As I listened to Nivana’s Nevermind album, though, music became a passionate affair for me, and no longer a passive relationship. I got the edge I wanted, but now I loved music – I started to seek stuff that spoke to me. I was learning how to play drums at the time, and so I played Nirvana songs. I made friends at school who also liked Nirvana. We got their first album Bleach and loved that too. We played music together. My parents – God bless em – let us practice in their garage. We played a few shows throughout the remainder of high school.
Do you see how this wasn’t just about Nirvana anymore? I began to play music with others. I made good friends. I had fun and I became a music critic – not professionally, of course, but I am aware of the massive impact music can have on a life, so I love music, I argue about music, I complain about music, I am fickle about the music that I do and don’t like. It’s really important to me.
For some people, music is entertainment, but for me it’s passion, it’s definition, and it’s essential. Music is something serious and music is something fun at the same time. There are choices that musicians make and choices we make as listeners that are really important – these things can either drive or mute our passions. “Smells Like Teen Spirit” began my path of pursuing passion.
Nevermind was released 20 years ago. The moral of my story is not “I wasn’t cool and I became cool because I liked cool music.” Here’s what I want you to learn from this: something small, like one song, can change everything. The message is not to find the song that changes you, but I want you to be that song that changes people’s lives. Live passionately.
Love, Dad.
